Somehow, I've managed to attract quite the crowd of followers on Twitter. So many, in fact, that I thought you all deserve a primer on exactly what you've signed yourself up for. Drop slips will be available at the end of the post.
The Stats: Based on results from the approximately 800 Twitter apps out there on the internet, I can safely conclude I've been on Twitter for almost two years, I currently follow over 200 people, and over 1150 follow me. My Twitter grade is 99.8 (good enough to get into Twitter college, I hope), my Twitter Happyscore is 490 (I'm "Somewhat Happy!" Yay?), and apparently I don't curse on Twitter as much as I should. I'm assuming all of this is very important information you need to know - otherwise why would someone take the trouble of creating applications to gather it?
The Tweets: I am not a Social Media Guru, and Twitter is not my job - therefore, my use of it fluctuates quite a bit from day to day and depends entirely on my mood and workload. I also am not a fancy-pants smart phone user, so I don't use it when away from my computer, except in Direct Message emergencies. In short - my tweet rate is honestly reflective of my life. I won't flood you with three dozen messages a day, but I do appreciate the conversational aspect of Twitter and often chat with other users as opposed to strict Status Updates Just About Me. I also post many links and announcements I think are cool. I am not averse to the occasional re-tweet, if done tastefully as an important part of the story.
If I seem to be talking about a lot of things you have no interest in, that's probably because I belong to a few different and distinct sets of communities that intersect on Twitter.
The Followers: Here are some assorted reasons I imagine you might be following me.
- You know me personally and feel obligated to. Sorry about that. If it helps, I'm obligated to follow you too.
- You live in the same city as I do. Columbus, Ohio has a great Twitter community, and several connections I've made over Twitter have resulted in real-life gigs, purchases and/or friendships. So that's cool.
- You're a skeptic. In the sense that you're also a part of the online critical thinking community and you know me from Skepchick or Central Ohioans for Rational Inquiry. You guys are cool, too.
- You're a web designer/developer/other-techie-type. Bless you all, or no one would appreciate me tweeting yet another Smashing Magazine link to a collection of 457 websites that use the color magenta.
- You're a film person. I like movies. I like to write about them and talk about them, and I'm actively working to strengthen my film contacts on Twitter. Be prepared for that.
- You saw I have a bunch of people following me and assume I must be worth it.Well, you might reevaluate that opinion after a while. But welcome anyway.
- You're a spammer or young guy who follows only young, apparently pretty women. If this is the case, go away.
The Follow-Back: I do have email notifications for followers turned on, and I try to check out every new follower. If you fit into one of those categories above (excepting the last two) and 1) are visibly active on Twitter, 2) have a link to a site where I can understand who you are, and 3) don't have a crazy following/follower ratio, I'll most likely follow you back. If I don't follow you immediately and you think I should, @ me and I probably will.
Some assorted reasons I might not follow you that are nothing personal:
- You might not have done your homework on me. I'm pretty chill when it comes to the type of people I'm friends with, but when it comes to getting daily updates about you and your life, I'm probably going to draw a few lines. For example, it's made clear on many of my internet-things that I am a scientific skeptic. Therefore, I'm probably not going to be into your life as a psychic, Reiki master or homeopathic menopause cure peddler. (And to that last one - not only am I a skeptic, I'm only 27 years old. Thanks for reminding me of my impending barrenness.) If we have different worldviews, cool - but if all you're doing on Twitter is promoting that differing worldview, especially for a business, and we have nothing else in common, what's really the point? All it tells me is that you aren't interested in connecting with me as a person, but just as a potential follower.
- Your updates are protected. Unless I've met you in real life, I don't follow back anyone when I can't even tell what kind of updates I'd be getting if I did. Contact me via some other means to introduce yourself and we'll go from there.
- I don't speak your language. Literally. I'm genuinely sorry about this one. I'm just not as skilled as you.
- There's just too many of you! This is where that "@ me and I'll try to follow you" advice comes in.
Other: I don't play Twitter games. It's also nothing personal. I don't pick teams or vote in popularity contests and only take quizzes when extremely bored. If you do know me, then chances are you're comfortable in this information, since I've held a similar anti-meme stance since, well, the beginning of memes.
There, I think that's everything you could possibly want to know about me and Twitter. Unless you don't even know me on Twitter, in which case you can find me at @antiheroine.